WHAT GETS IN OUR WAY...DOING THIS BY OURSELVES

 

"The tragedy of our day is that we are raising men who know how to 'win' but do not know how to live.  What if you don't have to hold it all together by yourself?  What if your strength isn't measured by what you produce or how much you can take, but by where you are anchored?

Brother, the world will keep piling on.  It will keep telling you to 'man up' and push through.  But Christ invites you to something better:  to lay your burdens down, to anchor your soul in Him, to know that even if the world leaves you on the bench, He sits beside you.  You may lose the applause, the trophies, even your dreams - but you will never lose yourself in Him.

Hold fast.  The world needs men who know where to stand when everything else falls away.  Men who can say 'I am not alone.'

Let that be your story."

     Chris Harper

"You are not separate.  You never were.  You never could be.  You're not a drop in the ocean. you're the ocean in a drop.  A wave is not separate.  It is THE ocean, expressing itself in temporary form.  Misunderstanding this...thinking you are separate...is what creates suffering."

     From "The Ancients Decoded Reality"

We have heard many times that the opposite of addiction is connection.  Connection to ourselves, connection to God, and connection to other people.  Addiction of any kind creates isolation.  We hide.  We feel not just guilt, but shame.  We live in fear of getting caught.  We live in a cesspool of regret.  We lie, justify, and minimize.  We make excuses.  We lose ourselves and we don't even know who we really are anymore.  And so often we think we can dig ourselves out of this black hole, but we can't.  Not by ourselves.  We might be able to "white knuckle" some sobriety for a while, but it won't last.  It can't.  This applies to all of us, not just addicts.  We live in a fallen world, and we live in a fallen culture which expects us...especially men...to just suck it up and do better.

But Jesus never says, "You've got this."  He says, "I've got you."

I was reminded of this as I re-watched season one of "The Chosen."  In episode four we learn the story of Simon, his deep tax debt, and his sketchy plans to get himself, and his brother Andrew, out of that debt.  But none of his ideas work, and the harder he tries the worse things get.  He's one of those guys who thinks big, talks a good story, yet comes up short every time.  He's had gambling issues and now his life seems to be crumbling around him.  Have you ever experienced anything like that?  Hopelessness is no fun...I know.

Simon finally tells his wife, Eden, what's been going on, and why he feels he needs to fish on Shabbat.  Their conversation hit home for me, because he sounds like the classic addict, and she is the frustrated wife who just wants the truth.  Eden to Simon..."At least you were honest with me.  You're always trying to do everything by yourself.  Where is your faith?  The popular Simon - fixing everything and charming people all by yourself.  That is why you're stuck and now you're off to fix it by yourself again!  Maybe God can get your attention now."

Simon leaves to go fish all night.  He has until the next day to have a record catch, or the Romans will come find him, and his life may be over.  If he's lucky, he'll only end up in prison.  He's desperate and He's scared.  Angry and frustrated, and mad at God, yelling at him while on his boat in the middle of the night.  Soon help does show up.  His brother Andrew, John, James, and their father Zebedee, and they help him fish the rest of the night.  Nothing but empty nets.

The morning sun rises with the feelings of hopelessness and the realization that Simon has made a complete mess out of his life.  He has hit rock bottom, and as Eden said, he's stuck.  But we know the story, right?  Jesus is there, on the shore, waiting.  For him.  Throw the nets over the other side, He tells them.  Reluctantly, they do.  And then those same nets are full.  So full the boat almost capsizes.  An unbelievable miracle!

But this is not a fishing story!  It's a story about each of us.

I love how Jesus stands there, grinning ear to ear, as He watches the excitement, amazement, and joy of those fishermen as they strained to haul those now full nets into the boat.  It's obvious that this is what brings Jesus joy...healing others.  And He begins right here with Simon.  Imagine the joy the Savior feels as He heals us!

Simon is now overcome with emotion, because this stranger has saved him!  Andrew had told him that he had seen the Messiah, but Simon had not believed him.  But now...could it be possible?  Simon kneels at the feet of Jesus and cries..."I am a sinful man.  You don't know who I am.  The things I've done.  I'm sorry."  Jesus responds simply, "lift up your head, fisherman."  Simon looks up and asks, "what do you want from me?  Anything you ask I will do."

"Follow me."

"I will."

And then this promise..."You have much bigger things ahead of you, Simon, son of Jonah."

As Eden predicted, God certainly got Simon's attention.  How has He gotten yours?  It turns out that Simon could not fix himself...

So let's review...

...Simon is a poser.  He acts like life is good when it is anything but.

...He makes a mess out of his life, time and time again.

...He lies to his wife about what he is and isn't doing.

...His back's against the proverbial wall, and he's stuck.

...His one last ditch effort fails miserably, and he hits his own personal rock bottom.

...Unexpected and unknown to Simon, Jesus shows up.

...Simon finally recognizes his own weakness and failure and sin, and repents.  And it's important to  note that there was no "process" of repentance.  It was an event, when Simon finally surrendered and    simply said "I'm sorry," and meant it.

...Did Jesus then scold him, shame him, call him an idiot or a loser?  No.  He only asked him to lift his eyes to His.  Just look.

...Simon, in that moment, turns his life, and his will, over to the Savior.

...Jesus asks just one thing..."Follow me."  Two simple words that changed the direction of Simon's life forever.  

...Simon had no idea...absolutely none...what was in store for him, but he was willing.  Why?  Because he was grateful.  He'd been saved!

...Jesus promised him a much larger life.  Not easier, but bigger.  More abundant.  Both exciting and heartbreaking.  We know how that story ends, but Simon had no clue.  He just went.

...And Jesus then invites James and John along and promised even more followers on the journey.  Simon wouldn't be traveling alone.

Don't forget.  Step 1 of the 12 steps is finally admitting our life is a mess and we cannot manage it any longer.  Step 2 is the hope that God can restore us to complete spiritual health.  And then Step 3 is when we choose to turn our wills and our lives over to the care of God, the Eternal Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ.  Simon went through each of those steps.  As soon as he realized who Christ was and what He had done for him, he was willing to "take His yoke" upon him...to partner with the Savior in living his life, for the rest of his life.  He lived a life of gratitude.

These three steps, and Simon's story, are not just for addicts.  They are for each of us.  You might say, "well, my life's great.  It's not a mess.  Not even close."  But...when we try and try and try again to do life on our own, without the help of the Savior or the help of people around us, it just does not go well.  It doesn't work.  Remember though, Jesus Christ is not a life coach, He is a Savior.  He saves us and He justifies us.  He redeems us.  And He will sanctify us as we let Him.  But He will do none of that unless we want it and allow it to happen.  Sometimes we must plead for it...Enos...and other times He chases after us and stops us in our tracks...Paul, Alma, me.  His Grace is real and He will save us wherever we are, no matter what we have done.  

He will just say, "Look up."  "Follow me."  And then He provides people, places, leaders, therapists, coaches, family members, and endless opportunities.  He heals us, and He usually does that through other people, as we do our part and our work.  As Ezra Taft Benson said, "Men and women who turn their lives over to God will discover that He can make a lot more out of their lives than they can.  He will deepen their joys, expand their vision, quicken their minds, strengthen their muscles, lift their spirits, multiply their blessings, increase their opportunities, comfort their souls, raise up friends, and pour out peace."  I love that because it is true!  I've experienced it, and I know so many who have as well.

So much of what we cling to in life is inconsequential...it just does not matter.  As soon as we surrender we can experience that rebirth that Jesus told us we must have.  That is what will change our lives.  We don't have to wait for redemption...it doesn't have to be a future event.  If we just let go and let God, we can find the joy we've been chasing after all along.  

We live in world of extreme loneliness and it's killing us.  Christ is relational.  We were never meant to do this alone, as we read in Genesis.  We need help, we need support, we need friends, and we need Jesus.  If, in fact, we exist that we "might have joy," there is only one proven way to have that.  I believe the entire point of all scripture is to show us that God is with us and that He will not abandon us.  Yes, He will let us make all the horrible choices we want, and He will let us suffer the consequences of those choices, but He will be there when we turn around and cry out for Him, as often as we need Him.  

So...just let go.  Don't go it alone.  Jesus is waiting on the shore...